So where do I stand...I have always co-slept with my bubs, & TBH I never really thought about it, for me it was natural. I could say that it was a cultural thing, but I couldn't imagine when Elijah was a bub, being anywhere else but beside me, in my bed. &, being a first-time mama & flying solo, having my baby close gave me a sense of comfort & security. This was especially true in the early days when I was breast feeding. For me as an exhausted mum also recovering from a C-section; co-sleeping meant, I was doing my very best trying to take care of both of our needs. 🥺
Elijah and I naturally developed a strong bond & understanding with each other. My boy seemed to just know that sometimes mama was struggling & at those times, he would knowingly relax. The bond that co-sleeping created between us, was instinctive & nurturing for both of us. Now that I read the pros of co-sleeping, I can see why in my circumstance, it was a natural process for me. 😁
Wins of co-sleeping:
1. Enhanced Bonding: Co-sleeping can strengthen the parent-child relationship through increased physical closeness.
2. Improved Sleep: Some parents find that co-sleeping makes it easier to comfort and soothe their child during the night, leading to better sleep for everyone.
3. Cultural Norms: In some cultures, co-sleeping is a common practice that promotes family unity & interdependence.
4. Convenience: Co-sleeping can simplify night-time feedings & make it easier for breastfeeding mothers to nurse their baby.
5. Emotional Security: Sleeping close to a parent can provide a sense of security & comfort for the child, potentially reducing anxiety.
I also know that not every parent is like me, & on reflection if I had known the cons of co-sleeping it may have made me think differently. We all need to know both sides of the story, so we can all make the best decisions. Not like me who just thought it was normal, ‘cos in my culture, parents sharing their beds was not seen or considered as unusual! 🤭
Considerations toco-sleeping:
- Safety Risks: There is a potential risk of accidental suffocation, entrapment, or overheating when sharing a bed with a young child.
- Sleep Disturbances: Some parents may find that co-sleeping disrupts their own sleep patterns & hinders their ability to rest comfortably.
- Dependency: Co-sleeping could lead to a child becoming overly reliant on parental presence for falling asleep, making it challenging for them to self-soothe.
- Intimacy Concerns: Co-sleeping may impact the intimacy between partners if one or both feel uncomfortable sharing the bed with a child.
- Transition Challenges: Moving a child from co-sleeping to independent sleeping arrangements can be difficult & may require a gradual adjustment process.
Now being presented with this information, would I have changed my decision toco-sleep?TBH,no,‘cos nothing happened that made me think differently - thankfully with all my naivety, co-sleeping for me was a beautiful experience.
But since I wouldn't have changed my own decision, I think it's important for parents seriously considering co-sleeping, to know how to do it safely.
Co-sleeping can be done safely by following these guidelines:
- Use a firm mattress: Ensure that the mattress is firm to reduce the risk of suffocation.
- Avoid soft bedding: Keep pillows, blankets, and other soft bedding away from the baby to prevent suffocation or overheating.
- Create a safe sleep environment: Place the baby on their back to sleep, without any loose bedding or toys around them.
- Avoid alcohol and drugs: Do not co-sleep if you are under the influence of alcohol, drugs, or medications that may impair your awareness.
- Consider a sidecar or co-sleeper: Using a sidecar or co-sleeper that attaches securely to the adult bed can provide a separate space for the baby while still allowing for close proximity.
- Position the baby safely: Place the baby in a position where they cannot roll off the bed or get trapped between the mattress & the wall.
- Monitor the baby: Be aware of the baby's position & movements while co-sleeping to ensure their safety throughout the night.
- Avoid smoking: Do not smoke in the bed or bedroom where co-sleeping occurs, as this increases the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).
By following these safety guidelines, you can reduce the risks associated with co-sleeping & create a safe sleeping environment for both you & your bubs. 😍 Now, you may have read a previous blog of mine -
Looking back – what should've been on my baby register list? 🤔 (philandteds.com)
I had mentioned the phil&teds® traveller™ cot & how it would have been a game changer for me, not only ‘cos it can be used for years with your bub, but it includes a co-sleeping mode that keeps your newborn up close & personal yet allows for a bit of personal space as well. Knowing what I know now; having a sleeping solution that could be attached to my bed, that would keep Elijah close & safe, with me feeling secure & comfortable from having him within arm's reach - we would have had the best of both worlds! The separation that I needed to recover from my C-section, but the closeness to ease my anxiety of a first-time mama flying solo would have been gold!! Also, the fact that traveller™ is super-duper light would have helped as I could've taken this cot around the house with me, without straining with the weight of it! ‘Cos mamas out there know that it takes between 4-8 weeks to fully recover from a caesarean!
So definitely check traveller™ out - a money saving, unique 4–in –1 solution from newborn right up to toddler years, that you can use at home or away, indoors or outdoors: for sleep or play every day!!
Find out more about this magical cot traveller™ here
So, to co-sleep, or not to co-sleep... it's a personal choice, but make the choice that is right & safest for all. & actually, maybe the answer is merely whether there is an innovative product out there like traveller™ that takes the guess work out & solves your problem from the get-go! Giving parents or expecting parents a choice where they can have the best of both worlds, thoughtful separation without the anxiety – now that's what I’m talking about. 🤗
Sofia 🩷
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